Sunday, June 14, 2009

From The Studio To Your Stereo

Fans, friends, and co-conspirators,

We cannot finish this new album without your support, and listed below are the various ways you can join the cause. Become an Undie, and together we will have Travelling Show, our best record yet, in cellophane for October of this year. Read on!

ps. Once you get to the $50 package and beyond, it will be cheaper for you (by several shipping dollars), and we will see more of your money (by several PayPal dollars) if you send an e-transfer, or if you mail us a cheque, payable to:

Corin Raymond & Sean Cotton
39 Oxford St.,
Toronto, Ontario
M5T 1N8


Especially if you know that we will not need to ship your package to you. Regardless, mailing us a cheque, or sending a transfer by email (corin@theundesirables.com), will work best.

It's worth noting, also, that PayPal accepts all currencies.

pps. When we hit $10,000.00 we will make a digital download of Singing Bones (never before recorded) available to you all. We can't wait for you to hear it. Thank you friends, and read on!!

$12.50 Digital Download of Travelling Show

For $12.50 we'll send you the album, unadorned. Your $12.50 for our music. In your iPod. Switchy switchy.





$25.00 Pre-Purchase of a Signed CD

For $25 we'll send you a signed copy of the disc itself. Whether our signatures and inscribed message to you will hurt the re-sale value, only time will tell. That you will have helped us make our best record yet, that we can guarantee.





$50 Pre-Purchase of a Signed CD plus 1 Other Merch Option

For $50 we will send you the signed CD, as described above, and, for your doubled-commitment to the cause, you choose 1 option from the list below to go with it. You give us $50, we give you the album, plus some good shwag. How about it? Tradsies?

MERCH OPTIONS (all $25.00 Value)

(a) Undie Shirt

(b) Undie Wear

(c) Undie Pack: A limited-edition signed poster, a sticker, a fridge magnet, pin, and beer-cozy (in Australia they call them stubby-holders, and they are so right-- 'beer cozy' sounds like you're drinking with your grandmother-- not that I'm opposed to that).

(d) Undie Ticket: One ticket to any Undesirables show






Merch Options
Clothing Sizes:



$100 Pre-Purchase of a Signed CD, plus 3 Merch Options

For $100 we would do a lot of things you wouldn't brag about in church, but that's not what we're talking about here. In this case, for $100 we will send you a signed CD, and to go along with it you'll be granted three choices from the list below. This one's like your own private Undesirables Genie. Make it three shirts, three tickets, or any combination that pleases. It's your lantern, rub it any way you like. Which reminds me of those other things we would do for a $100. Just not here.

MERCH OPTIONS (all $25.00 Value)

(a) Undie Shirt

(b) Undie Wear

(c) Undie Pack: A limited-edition, signed poster, sticker, fridge magnet, pin, beer-cozy (stubby-holder)

(d) Undie Ticket: One ticket to any Undesirables show






Clothing SIzes:
Indicate your 3 Option Choices



$250.00 Stop Fighting It: Become An Undie!

Time to up the ante. For $250 you will be on the receiving end of:

(a) Two signed CDs. Yours, of course, plus an additional, gift copy, inscribed to a recipient of your choosing (your Uncle in Texas, for instance, or your grandmother-- the one who sends you those beautiful hand-knit beer cozies)
(b) An Undie Shirt
(c) The Undie Pack: A signed poster, sticker, fridge magnet, pin, and stubby holder
(e) Two tickets to any Undesirables performance

PLUS..

... a Digital Download of a Live Undesirables Show

AND...

Your name will be included in the liner notes of the CD package. At this point you are making the record with us, and have officially joined our Order. You are now an UNDIE. It's a dubious distinction at best-- it may even do harm to your reputation... but though we may walk under a hail of derision, down a gauntlet of hisses and jeers, we will walk together, as Undies. Wherever you go, you'll have us on your side. You'll be in bad shape and good company, and that's not such a terrible way to travel.






T-Shirt Sizes:
Your name for the CD:



$500.00 Limited Edition Packages

For $500 you will receive everything in the $250 package (hail of derision, gauntlet of jeers, etc.), a special mention in the liner notes of the album package, AND one option from the list of veritable roller-coaster excitements offered below:

(1) Cinema Safari: Go to the movies with The Undies! Let's sit in the flickering dark together and be transported to that Other World. We'll take you to our favourite shawarma place, and to a rep cinema showing something that promises to transport. Shawarma, baclava, movie, popcorn, Reese's Peanut Butter Cups, on us. (only TWO Cinema Safaris available)

(2) Dinner on Spadina w/The Undesirables: Join us for our favourite chinese food. Let's go somewhere with pigs and ducks hanging in the window! Let's eat spices that make our scalps prickle. Mmm. Whatever you like to eat, I think Spadina's got you covered. If you like sweet and sour pork, you're really laughing. Our treat, right down to the orange slices and fortune cookies. (only TWO dinners available)

(3) Take in a Live Show with The Undesirables: Be our guests to a live music performance at either Hugh's Room, The Cameron House, The Dakota Tavern, or The Horseshoe. We'll pick a good one and the tickets are on us. A night of beautiful chaos (and inevitably Not My Dog), might ensue. We may cross the line. This night is not insured, and there are no guarantees that you will be able to function the following day. (only TWO available, though one may feel like four)

(4) A Two Hour Guitar Lesson with Sean Cotton: Sean will help you, one on one, to learn any Undesirables songs (or ANY songs) you want to get under your fingers. Includes an organic juice (this would be perfect the day after number 3) at Casa Undies. (only TWO Guitar Lessons available)

(5) A two-hour, Undies-style Tour of The Kensington Market: which includes a visit to our house, one of Corin's above-mentioned organic juices, and a curry chicken soup at Saigon Palace, or perhaps lunch at The Tibet Cafe. Or a roasted vegetable sandwich at Herbivore. We'll just follow the sidewalk. Our treat. (only TWO Market Tours available)







Limited Edition Options:
T-shirt Sizes:
Your name for the CD:



$1000.00 Limited Edition Deluxe Packages

The bargoons just keep on a-comin', friends. For $1,000.00 you will receive the $250 package (duh), a specific shout-out in the liner notes, AND one of the options below (TWO of each available):

(1) Songwriting Workshop: A private 2 hour session. You bring us two or three songs, and we'll go over them with an Undesirables comb, giving you honest and helpful feedback from our perspective as a song-writing team. (only TWO Songwriting Workshops available)

(2) Book Sherpa: Corin will take you on a book-trolling expedition, to his favourite new/used bookstores in Toronto, and he will find you the perfect book. He will use his supernatural Book Sense to locate the book that has been looking for you, and/or the appropriate title for any friends/family to whom you'd like to make the gift of a compelling read (non-reading friends/family especially welcome). Corin will inevitably fill your shopping bag (or at least your to-read list) with the books that have most inspired the songs of The Undesirables. This expedition will conclude with an organic juice, and a well-deserved languish on the rattan-furnished porch at Casa Undies, in order to leaf through, and be further seduced by, our respective purchases. (only TWO Book Sherpas available)


(3) Vinyl Expedition:
The Undies will take you to Paradise Bound, a fantastic record/CD shop in The Market, and/or down to Queen St. West (Rotate This, Neurotica), and out east to Ric's Basement at Queen & Pape (this place is a treasure trove!). Sean and Corin will take you on an analog/digital troll, to look for the missing pieces in our/your music puzzle. Folks are always asking us what our influences are, so lets go on 'The Undesirables' tour (...we're your private sherpas.. we sherpa for money...). This expedition includes, and concludes with, an organic juice, and a listening session in the kitchen of Casa Undies. 'Casa Undies' might give you the wrong idea. It's not that kind of party. It's just where we live. (TWO Vinyl Expeditions available)







LE Deluxe Options:
T-shirt Sizes:
Your name for the CD:



$2000.00 Limited Edition House Concert Package (Only 4 available)

For $2,000.00 you will receive the $250 package, AND:

The Undesirables will perform a House Concert in your home. You are encouraged to sell tickets, by which you can earn your money back, but the concert is paid for. One of the sweet things about this particular patronage is that it is the only one with which you can recoup what you have donated. Howzabout that?

House Concerts are THE most magical way to experience music. They are becoming more popular than they've ever been, they're an incredible community event, a great party, and in this case, the celebration would be for a landmark album that you have Executive-Produced (you will receive an Executive Producer credit in the liner notes of the album for this one. We're entering serious patronage territory now).

Let's make some Canadian Music History together, in this age of the Small Time. (only FOUR House Concerts available)






T-shirt Sizes:
Your name for the CD:



$5000.00 Limited Edition Undesirables Song Package (only 2 available)

Five thousand dollars makes you our record company. You will receive everything in the $2000.00 Package (which we've upped-the-ante to include the $250 package TIMES TWO, as well as a concert in your home...

AND...

We will write an Undesirables song to suit whatever subject or occasion you choose (anniversary, birthday, a piece of personal history, your vocation, etc.). We will perform the song at your house concert and provide you with a studio recording for your own purposes.

AND...

You will receive an Executive Producer credit on the OUTSIDE of the package. (only TWO Limited Edition Undesirables Song Packages available)







T-shirt Sizes:
Other T-shirt Size?
Your name for the CD:



$10,000.00 Limited Edition Lifetime Undie Package

Are you serious? Or you just scrollin'? You even readin' this one???

For $10,000 you will receive everything in the $5,000 package, which includes the house concert and the song, along with:

1) A supply of the CD for you to share with friends, family, co-workers, and anyone you like for as long as you like (or up to 100 copies, whichever comes first)

2) The Merch Package times five (gifts, again, for family, friends, or fellow fans)

3) Two lifetime V.I.P. passes to any Undesirables appearances anywhere.

4) A signed, One-Of-A-Kind Undesirables guitar. Weathered and beaten by hundreds of shows and thousands of miles.

There are two Limited Edition Lifetime Undie Packages, and two guitars, available.

They are a Jasmine (Takamine) and a Guild (True American). Songs like Singing Bones, Traveling Show, Alex Warner Revisited (all on the new album), along with California Wine, Fill Me Up With Sound, Down and Out, Look Out Jack, Sinking Into Sleep, Dancing On The Faultline, and Round Trip Love Song, were all written on the Jasmine. The Guild, on the other hand, was the guitar with which we produced If I Send For You, Up Above The Clouds, Night Train (all on the new album), Asking Me To Give You The Blues, The Dog You Forgot To Let In, This Town, Bus Stop Walk, 90 Days, Sandy Side of the Moon, The Butcher Song, and Summer's Gone.

Sean Cotton played these guitars to death but the ghosts they contain are top drawer.

5) One signed, framed photo of the guitar in action, from The Undesirables' archives.

If you give The Undesirables $10,000, we're yours for life. You will have our fealty till the end of the line. Wherever we go, and whatever we achieve, you will be in the fabric of The Undesirables' story, and of our success. The more we are able to raise, the freer we are to do the work we're here to do, which is to write the best songs, and to make the best albums, of our career. This is our time. We've still got something to show the world which they haven't seen yet, and donations at this end of the scale are going to set us free to do it. Of course, every contribution helps, and, if I may quote John Prine, 'a lot of little will do'. If I may quote Corin Raymond, 'where there's a will there's a wallet'. At least that's what we're hoping.